Tuesday, November 5, 2019
Why You Shouldnt be Too Nice at Work
Why You Shouldnt be Too Nice at Work It always pays to be a nice person. Almost always. Some people who are genuinely (or un-genuinely) ââ¬Å"too niceâ⬠are less likely to be taken seriously, and less likely to stand up for themselves or others- even in cases where such action would be just. Perhaps youââ¬â¢ve also heard the phrase ââ¬Å"nice guys finish last.â⬠While thatââ¬â¢s not necessarily true, there are certain situations in which you should curb the niceties and just concentrate on effective communication. Here are a few reason to keep in mind.1. Give, Give, Give, and Never GetIf you consistently give more than youââ¬â¢re asked, and take very little in return, rather than be lauded for your generosity, people will start to get accustomed to this being the pattern. Youââ¬â¢ll get none of the thanks and you may even come to resent the imbalance.2. Quid Pro QuoIf you up your niceness level too much, you might find yourself expecting a similar level of niceness out of everyone around you. Whe n this fails to materialize, you might grow a little peeved.3. Youââ¬â¢ll Be Like an ATMPeople will start coming to you only when they need something, which can be extremely alienating. Youââ¬â¢ll feel like a doormat- like youââ¬â¢ve become a tool to help others succeed, while achieving very little for yourself. You may even attract needy people, like a magnet.4. Youââ¬â¢ll Project WeaknessYou might be perceived as weak, particularly if you never say no to anyone. If youââ¬â¢re always doing favors and putting others first, people will not only come to take advantage of you, they will also just assume you have no control over what you will and wonââ¬â¢t agree to. They might come to mistrust you for this.5. You Wonââ¬â¢t Take Care of YourselfSometimes itââ¬â¢s important to say ââ¬Å"noâ⬠to others so you can say ââ¬Å"yesâ⬠to yourself. Remember self care? Yeah, thatââ¬â¢s not just something you make sure others do to reach their ideal fulfillmen t. No one can make sure youââ¬â¢re taken care of but you. And if you arenââ¬â¢t getting your own needs met, you might become needy in return with your friends or family.6. Youââ¬â¢ll Seem InauthenticIf you just automatically are generous and nice and kind, then it might not seem like true generosity, niceness, or kindness. Make sure that when youââ¬â¢re being super nice or going above and beyond that you really mean it. Be friendly when itââ¬â¢s deserved. Pick up slack when itââ¬â¢s equitable to do so, not just an expectation.7. You Wonââ¬â¢t ContributeConstructive criticism is extremely important, betweenà both friends and colleagues. If youââ¬â¢re so nice that youââ¬â¢re reluctant to give anything but praise, then chances are youââ¬â¢re letting people down. Focus more on helping the team succeed, rather than on being well-liked- and too nice to give honest feedback.
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